BondiCigar.com is a personal non-profit website. If it was for profit, we’d have to pay Leunig et al.
Other useless stuff:
Throsby ~ a fop who fancies himself the modern-day Oscar Fingal O’Flahertie Wills Wilde (see, I told you) but with neither the class nor wit. He arranges #AusPol sarcasm and deploys the odd “in-depth” (strangled laughter) recensions of his routine first-draft stuff-ups.
The Cigar ~ the editor (he thinks we haven’t noticed). Looks after the news scraps and assorted rubbish, then sweeps out, mops up, and turns off lights. Doesn’t smoke cigars but has the appearance of doing so (and the bouquet). Crankier than he looks.
Jhyimy Two Hats ~ No, not the real 2 Hats, but one of our staffers wearing his other hat (that would make it 3 hats, come to think of it) in tribute to Peter James Paul Millhouse, aka Jhyimy "Two Hats" Mhiyles, who became Bondi Beach’s most famous resident… until the machine stitched him up. And that photo is not PJ, it’s actually our staffer.
And you thought newspapermen were all dandys.
But what’s it really about?
In a nation whose psyche amounts to little more than a noisy parochial swarm of football supporters, there exists a tendency to exclaim too loudly of "our national spirit" or "the essence of this country."
One such little tin pot legend is the collection of folk lore and urban myths surrounding – and nauseous self reference to – Bondi. This applies equally to the French Riviera, or California’s Long Beach.
Hang on, no it doesn’t. We’re really loud insistent wankers.
To overwhelm and confuse the foreign reader with strange anomalies lighting the underside of a representative east coast Australian city and the tremendous amount of fluffy hooha surrounding it. And what goes for it, so goes for Australia.
To gently massage the news reports from this grand modern city, trying to wheedle, wrest, winnow and wring out the oddities and paradoxes – not to mention utter nonsense – of this brash little LA-wannabe.
To be as mischievous as necessary that my boredom might pass quickly.
Very little. Mostly boredom!
Oh, and those hysterical evening television news services, a half-dozen half-baked radio shock-jocks (legends in their own ratings period), and perchance one or two ink-slinging outfits. You know, advertising foldouts that contain a brochure inside with some news copied from the Internet.
Freely and sadly admitted, BondiCigar is characterized by deficiencies in both diligence and smarts – but that is our style and we must make do.
Comprising rants and reprocessed timely stories of this fair city, state, and nation, finely fiddled to my fickle facetious fancy.
BondiCigar fastidiously employs fair-use plagiarism formed from furtive theft of mainstream media posits. Our lip-service to copyright finds keywords nocuously switched in farcical frenzy.
Also abominable, appalling, atrocious and awful alliteration.